Uniting With Christ

Lately, I have been unable to sleep very well. I lay in bed for hours, a million things on my mind, keeping me awake. Or so I thought. It dawned on me that God may be trying to get my attention and I just ignored it. I think I will need to back up and explain a little bit more.

I went to a Healing Mass just a couple of weeks ago and when the Priest began praying over me, he told me some very specific things about my life, thoughts and feelings. He talked about my loneliness and pain, how I was hurt at a very young age (just an emotional wound), and how I want to be loved for my mind and heart and not my physical beauty, among many other things.

Some of the loneliness comes from desiring married life and realizing that, at the age of 27, I'm not getting any younger (haha). It's painful, you know? Have any of you ever felt this way? You desire a spouse to love and children to raise so much that it physically hurts? I'm not bringing this up so that you can pity me... No. My purpose is to share with you what I have learned through that pain.

More and more I have felt the need to offer up all my suffering for those I love and those who don't know the secret to my strength to endure this pain and carry on. But I haven't been very diligent (working on it...) and I haven't been certain of that being the end of what I am to do. This morning I got my answer.

Because of the Healing Mass a couple of weeks back, my parents now know of my struggles and they pray and worry (hopefully they pray more than they worry). Well, I spent the last two nights at my parents' house for Thanksgiving and this morning as I was getting ready to leave for work, my father approached me. He told me that he prays for me and that he felt like God was saying that what He wants is for me to unite my suffering with the Passion of our Blessed Savior.

Ouch. Ok... it's not like I don't want to do this, but I know it is going to be an extremely painful and difficult battle. The Lord gives me strength even though my flesh is weak. I ask for your prayers and I want all of my readers to know that you will be in my prayers too. God Bless you all.

Let us pray:

Passion of Christ, Strengthen Me

Passion of Christ, strengthen me! Strengthen me under the pressure of temptation. Strengthen me when principle is at stake. Strengthen me to do Your Will, My God. Strengthen me in moments of suffering, in times of loneliness, in periods of depression. Strengthen me that I may never swerve from You, dear Christ, nor weaken through human respect, through a desire to be popular, through hope of social distinction. Strengthen me to accept my cross and carry it generously to the end. On the battlefield of life, stand by me that I may never prove a traitor in the ranks. Stand by me that I may not be dazzled by the glitter and glow of the enemy camp.
Amen.